It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize
