Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
