They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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