and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize
