he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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