I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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