i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Randomize
