Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize