If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
