also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
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