Nicole vs. Life
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
