Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Randomize
