Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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