Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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