I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
is that a dick in a sweater?
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize