STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
