i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
When did angry sex become our thing?
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
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