maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
