So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
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