guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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