are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
