I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Randomize
