And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
