I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
