how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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