His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
