I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Randomize
