He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Randomize
