i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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