Need sex. Gaining weight.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
