I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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