I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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