Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
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