I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
