it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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