That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
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