Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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