yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
