if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Randomize