You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
