hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize
