ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
