ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Randomize
