dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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