Buhtt sex?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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