When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize
