The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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