i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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