I woke up to her vacumming the grass
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize