I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
