Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
